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Emails to my Therapist:
On Love, Death, Life Changes, Fears, Desires, Spiritual Yearning, Writing and Anything Else on My Mind

The Go-To Guilt Reflex (After A Week In Poland)

May 13, 2022
Dear Nicholas, Bob and I got home late Tuesday afternoon from a long-planned long-delayed trip and now, as I write, it’s Friday and I still haven’t gotten back to work. I feel like a terrible slacker. My reliable guilt reflex has kicked in. And the guilt itself feels terribly self-indulgent when refugees are on the […] Read More

Fear of Making a Mistake…A Big One

April 3, 2022
Dear Nicholas, For as long as I can remember, I’ve been guarding against making the giant mistake that will ruin everything, certainly the rest of my life and also the lives of others, likely including their children and grandchildren. It’s not a particular mistake. It could be anything: accidentally committing a terrible crime or burning […] Read More

Depression Hurts Like A Burn

March 9, 2022
Dear Nicholas, I just made a startling discovery after a couple of rather hard months. I somehow received the wrong medication a while back. (I’m writing you about this though you aren’t a prescriber these days. Just want to talk about it.) I thought maybe I was simply sad because several difficult things are going […] Read More

And I Thought I Was a Pacifist

February 27, 2022
Thought I was a pacifist until Russia attacked Ukraine. Doing some serious rethinking. Go Ukraine! Read More

Magical Knee Cure!

February 21, 2022
Dear Nicholas, There was a time in my life, near fifty years ago, when my friends and I would inquire of each other about the health of our cars. “How’s it holding up?” we’d say. These days I hear a lot more from friends about knees. Lots of replacements, knees that get stopped for inspection […] Read More

Big Big Birthdays…Husband Turns Eighty! Golly!

February 2, 2022
Hi, Nicholas, I know that turning eighty sounds like a trifle to anyone who has already done it, but for those of us who haven’t, it’s a significant figure. A Big Birthday. A Grand Occasion. Husband Bob is pleased to arrive on Friday February 4, (tomorrow) at this lofty point in life, then to venture […] Read More

Living with “an Animal Guy” in an “Animal House”

January 17, 2022
Dear Nicholas, I have just this week realized that we have animal images all over the house, Bob’s doing. How did I not notice the theme? And how do all these animals affect me? I don’t entirely know, but at the same time I have no doubt that they do. I’ve always thought I could […] Read More

Birthdaying and the Age of Change

January 9, 2022
Dear Nicholas, Something about turning 73 Saturday made me sleepy. Naps are not my usual form of birthdaying, but this time it was irresistible. Delicious sofa sleep most of the afternoon in the company of sleepy dogs. And then…! The Age of Change Last time I wrote I was depressed about moving out of my […] Read More

Writing Myself Out of Depression (trying to)

December 29, 2021
Dear Nicholas, I’m depressed. Have been most of the time since Christmas night. Writing usually helps, so here goes… Why I am so low is not clear, as is so often the case with depression. Christmas with my brothers and their families was wonderful. When we got home I began to sink. Bob’s theory about […] Read More

A Different Kind of Empty Nest

December 12, 2021
Dear Nicholas, I’m in the midst of moving my office–my writing nest–after sixteen years of working in desk-to-desk chatting distance of my dear friend writer Carrie Knowles. This place has been a second home for me.   We’re moving out because the building is sold. I’m leaving this nest behind–empty until the violin maker moves […] Read More


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